Mommy, What Does “Going Postal Mean?”

What if there were no “U.S. Mail”? It just isn’t the same, saying, “Don’t go FedEx on me!” With 560,000 United States Postal Service employees (down from 670,000 four years ago), the odds are pretty good that the old adage will apply sometime in the near future as a desperate USPS struggles to survive. The USPS still has more employees than all of the other major delivery services combined. Laid-off and “forced-retired” employees, particularly those who joined for the job security, are going to generate more than anger and bitterness. We all know it’s running out of money, and there are a few short-term solutions and a lot more longer-term answers if Congress will fund that entity after September.

Closing 3,700 post offices saves $200 million, not much towards a $9.2 billion (and rapidly rising) deficit, but better than a sharp stick in the eye. Postmaster General (remember when that was a good job?) Patrick Donahoe wants to save another $3+ billion by cutting Saturday delivery and is asking Congress not to be required to prefund medical benefits (it’s fiscally sound, but other federal agencies aren’t required to do it), which would save an instantaneous $5.5 or so billion. Much of this will be accomplished by the unheard of in postal-speak: 120,000 layoffs by 2015, with another 100,000 through retirement and attrition.

So let’s look at what is in your mailbox to see what bang we are getting for the buck. Hmmm… bills… bad news. Legal documents and official notices, like jury summonses, mechanics liens, demand and claim letters… usually bad news… and election materials (didn’t used to be bad news, but today?). Magazines (for those who still get the paper kind). A few happy holiday greeting cards for the mantle. Wedding invites. And spam. 3^rd class value coupons, catalogs (do we like these?), mass-mailings, simulated newspapers with nothing but ads, most of which is recycle/landfill material that never gets looked at. Letters from friend? Postcards? Invitations to cool events with friends? Mostly, we get these in email form.

So with a few rare exceptions, the mailbox is filled with stuff we really don’t want. But we are actually subsidizing the 3^rd class mailers we don’t want because these marketing materials are good for jobs… or so we are told. But in an era where survival is at stake, why are we subsidizing businesses that have digital alternatives? Not everyone has a computer. Okay, but everyone gets spam 3^rd class mail. Think of how much money we’d save if the USPS didn’t deliver mail addressed “Current Resident,” “Our Neighbor at __,” or anything without your name on it.

Kill the USPS? Yeah, but think of how many contracts and statutes require that materials be mailed to insure proper delivery. When postmarks determine a legal date? What happens if there is no Post Office to implement these mandates? And what about those isolated communities (where the costs of delivery are really high) that have no other real connection to the rest of society? Who investigates … er… “delivery”… fraud?

It’s time for the subsidy for 3^rd class mail to end…eliminate the category altogether. Raise rates across the board and figure how to cut even more Post Offices with kiosks and Web-based services. Allow the USPS to do fulfillment work for other delivery services on a contract basis. Pizza, anyone? Groceries? Newspapers (if there still are any)? Basically, in an Internet-linked world, the USPS needs to become the physical delivery system for the 21^st century. “Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night stays these couriers from the swift completion of their appointed rounds.” Get real!

I’m Peter Dekom, and change is difficult; massive change is really difficult to take.